A Lesson on Aspberger's

The other day, my ever-so-in-the-know roommate Molly asked if I’d heard of the writer Penelope Trunk. I had not, so I decided to google her, and the search brought up a plethora of results. Apparently, she’s been in the a lot of reputable newspapers, and currently writes a blog called the “Brazen Careerist,” in which she gives career advice--particularly to individuals in their twenties. I was relatively impressed with her writing, and was half-way through her most recent post, when Trunk casually mentioned she had Asperger’s Syndrome.

I was confused. Asperger’s is a mild form of Autism. Usually, people living with Asperger’s lack social skills needed for career success. That was my impression anyway. So, I asked Molly—who happens to be an Autism specialist thanks to her job—how someone with Asperger’s, like Trunk, could be so successful.

Molly’s reply was very educational. Your insight into the realm of autism will double, perhaps even triple, after reading her responses below. Note: This conversation was over gchat. The modern way to socialize.

Autism Gchat Convo. 101.

me: how do you function in society with Aspberger’s? I mean, be successful? That would explain why she broadcast her miscarriage on twitter I suppose

Molly: I have a staff who has it, and yes that would explain it. Autism is weird because you can move from having "severe autism" to Aspberger’s in some cases with the proper interventions. Some kids also start out without having any diagnosis, are developing typically and then begin to lose all language and social skills and are diagnosed with autism, this happened to a client at age 14, regressive autism its called I believe.

Strange, isn’t it? That’s why everyone is so concerned about the epidemic. One in every 150 kids is being diagnosed on the spectrum!

me: Wow that sucks, 14! So this trunk woman, can she function normally then? I mean, if she's successfully giving people advice?

Molly: Well, she's probably gone through a TON of cognitive-behavioral therapy and still does it, probably a lot of things she does seem off to most people, but they probably can't quite put their finger on what it is. For example saying exactly what she thinks.

me: Yeah. I suppose. It's just strange because I always thought you need good social skills to be in a field of career advice and journalism.

Molly: She probably has a really hard times in loud, bright places and needs a lot of breaks, its probably all stuff that is manageable now, but was super difficult to control. People with Aspberger’s usually go through intensive cognitive behavioral therapy and do social skills groups where they learn what is appropriate and what is not. They may understand life as more scripted than you or I, because that's how their minds function. They can for sure do it; they just have to learn it differently than other kids

me: It's more like, live by laws...rather than by relationship…I just subscribed to her blog, it's good.

Molly: Yeah, to some degree, but its not to say that there's no emotion, because there definitely is, it’s just difficult for them to process through it.

me: Perhaps I will have to turn this informative gchat into a blog.

Molly: YES! Success! You should interview me more. I am informative. ...On the ground!

Editor's Note: The "on the ground" references was to a SNL digital short you must google. Now.

Rain Rain Go Away & Halloween Blues

What's going on here? Do I live in Seattle? It's been raining for like, all of October. I don't think I've ever kept my umbrella in my schoolbag before. I just sounded like a second grader when I said schoolbag. Oh well.

Ok, let's transition to Halloween. I have always been really annoyed with Halloween. It takes so much effort to come up with a costume, and I'm forced to once a year. Usually, I just throw something stupid on the day of, but this year, I feel obligated to think out my false persona for once.

How do people come up with good costume ideas? I have no idea. Everything I think of either requires too much money, too much effort, or is really lame. Last year, I was an ex-pat. It was kind of stupid. My friends came up with killer ideas. Four of them were the perfect representation of John and Cindy McCain, and Sarah and Todd Palin. I had a colorful sheet wrapped around me.

Something's gotta give. Perhaps it will this year. I have plans to attack the Salvation Army downtown tomorrow, in hopes to find Halloween costume gold. Wish me luck.

Summer 2009: I Love My Life

My roommate came home today early, to work from home. It was around 2:00 p.m., and I, as usual these days, was sitting around "twiddling my thumbs," as they called it back in the day. My roommate, Molly, casually asked me what I was up to this afternoon. I replied, "Welp, I'm just waiting for my iPod to charge so I can go for a run - and then I think I might go to happy hour."

She started laughing. "You know," Molly said, "the other day I was talking to my co-worker about your life right now, and how you have it so easy because you're being essentially paid to take a class four hours a day and have nothing else to do."

Apparently, Molly's conversation with her co-worker arose from an e-mail I sent out the other day. "We're all really stressed at work right now," she continued, "so I started laughing when you sent out an e-mail asking if any of us had seen the new 'quick dry nail polish' you had just bought and now couldn't find. If only that were the biggest of my problems."

I started laughing. A lot. Because she's totally right. I have it good right now, thank you God. Molly forgot to tell her co-worker, however, that not only is my Arabic class the only commitment on my agenda this summer, it is also a class I have pretty much already taken and thus necessary study time is minimal. This means that I get to spend a lot of time reading and twiddling my thumbs. And going to Jordan and happy hour. Ah, if only this life could last forever.

Unfortunately all good things must come to an end. Thus, I'm sure when the craziness of school begins in September I will be wistfully longing for summer days gone by. Right now, however, I'm living them. Glory glory hallelujah. Don't worry though, I'm not completely wasting my time. My Arabic is getting pretty dang good. Well, at least when it comes to reading sentences that involve words about family, school or the weather. I'm hoping my abilities will go beyond that by the end of the summer. If they don't, well, with my schedule, I guess I don't have any excuse. Ah.

Ok, back to charging my iPod - my main activity for the day :).

Biking: Not for the Faint of Heart

Franklin Avenue and I spent way too much time together today. It was quite the annoying adventure - thanks to my bike's inability to function. Leading up to this adventure was my decision to bike to Arabic class. Today marked the first day of my four hours a day, four days a week intensive battle with the language. I thought a little exercise in the morning would stimulate my mind to meet this looming challenge. So I dragged my hand-me-down cycle from the basement, strapped on my aqua blue helmet and began pedaling to my day's destiny via the Greenway.

About half way through my ride, however, I noticed how difficult this bike trip had become for me. It was taking ridiculously long, and I was sweating and breathing far too heavily than any casual biker should. "I must be ridiculously out of shape," I thought. "Biking to school is way too much work. This was a bad idea. Tomorrow, I'm buying a parking pass." A few meters later I was barely closer to my destination and even more frustrated with the difficulty of my task at hand. It was then I recalled the words of my roommate the night before. "You better check the tires before you go tomorrow morning," she said. "A lot of times they'll deflate over the winter."

I look down. Sure enough, the back tire was like a pancake when it hit the pavement. Dangit. I gave it a few more spins and decided to get off the bike before breaking it further. I walked my bike the remainder of the distance to school - and by sheer blessing was only 20 minutes late to my first day of class.

Class was a bit boring. If there's one part of Arabic I know - it's the alphabet. Or, the Alif Baa - as it's called in Arabic. You'd think that I would have used my time in a boring class to come up with ideas as to how I was going to get home. Especially since I had no cash and no phone. Yes, you would think. However, apparently I had better things to woolgather about, and thus strategies for getting home weren't pondered until the proverbial bell rang.

I don't think well in crisis situations. These are things I could have done. I could have gotten cash, hopped on a bus, strapping my bike up in front. I could have taken my bike to the bike shop across the street from. With all these great options before me, what do I decide to do? Walk my bike home. Yes, from the West Bank to Uptown. Dumb.

It took me about three blocks to realize Uptown was a lot further than I thought, and that bikes with flat tires don't exactly roll light-heartedly as they are pushed down the street. I locked my bike up at the nearest rack I could find - which happened to be on Franklin Avenue, and decided to try my luck on foot sans bicycle. I knew the distance was long, but it was a nice day, and at least I'd gotten rid of my dead weight.

You would think that after eight years of living in the city, I would know my way around Minneapolis. Let me just say that I was perturbingly surprised when six blocks after ditching my bike, I discovered I had been walking in the OPPOSITE direction of my intended destination; home. I managed to trudge down East Franklin for SIX blocks before discovering this mistake. How? Sweaty and mad, I paused to reflect upon my options. I had no phone, no cash, no bus pass. However, I did have my cash card - thank God. After walking a few blocks in the right direction. I decided there was no way in hell I was walking the million or so blocks back to my place. My galavant, green efforts had failed me. So I walked into the Holiday Station across the street, took out cash, bought some pretzels to get change and charged towards the nearest bus stop. I hate the number two bus, it's the slowest line in the world, I'm sure of it. Yet, it seemed a far better option than walking at that point. So I hopped on it and 25 minutes of Franklin Avenue travel later, I was a mere two blocks from home. I made it.

Things I have learned from today's "adventure," include: Always check your bike tires, think of your options before attempting your task, and, buy a summer parking pass.

My bike's still locked up to that rack on Franklin Avenue. I've already considered how to get that home though. I'm going to go get it right now and shove it into my car. Then, it's going straight to Re-Cycle across the street for a new tire. Not that I plan on using it tomorrow, but still - should the moment arise when I need it - I'd like to have its use as an option.

Back At It!

Ah. I am thoroughly enjoying the sweet ease of summer. Everyday this week, I have awoken at 11:00 a.m. and thought, "What shall I do today? The world is my oyster." Or, something along those lines.

My answer to this mid-morning question differed a bit each day. Yesterday, I began thoroughly cleaning my room (although it still doesn't look great), and took a nice long run that left me with unbelievably sore legs. Then I drank wine on the porch with friends. Today, I took a good non-academic book and headed over to Spyhouse to read and drink iced lattes in the sun. Divine I tell you, divine.

Also today I've dabbled in a new business that may flourish this summer:). Selling old books on ebay. Ha. I've listed like ten books for $3 hoping to get someone who, for some odd reason, wants to read them. I am thinking of naming my store, "Great Books." Original, no? Really, it should be named "Sucky Books I Don't Want to Read," because I'm keeping all the good books. No one has bought my books yet and it's been an hour. This is not looking good. Anyone want to read, "Listening In, a History of Radio?" Come on, it's a goodie. Only three bucks plus shipping!

Random note, but today at SpyHouse, the lady next to me was giving her friend instructions on how to see the colours of auras. Weird. Ok I'm going to scavenge the web looking for regional estate sales - I figure I can find some more good stuff there to sell on ebay. I am quite the electronic enterpreneur.

Crazy

How am I twenty-six? It seems so surreal.

Where does time go? This is so weird. 25 was so.... ideal.

Perhaps though, 26 will be too.

I Have Secrets

It's April Fool's Day. Perhaps all the lies being told today are getting to me, for I'm in a tell-all mood. I have a few secrets that have been weighing me down lately, and I feel the odd need to confess them to my blogging community. So, let us begin.

Some Secrets
1) Sometimes, I don't get my homework done, or get enough sleep, because I stay up really late looking at fashion blogs or shopping online. I can't help it, it's a guilty, stress-relieving pleasure that results in delayed stress when I am sleepless and my homework's incomplete the next day.

2) I don't really like skiing. I admit, I have told many guys that I kind of like skiing, because I used to do it when I was younger a lot. I've realized however, that I am lying to them. I don't like skiing. I get cold, and going downhill at high speeds stresses me out hardcore. I say I like it because I like to sound adventerous. I'm done with that - I'm telling the truth. I don't really like skiing. Unless, it's in the Mtns of Colorado, and even then... However, I would like to try snowboarding at some point.

3) On that note, I'm not crazy fantastic about the outdoors for long periods of time. And by long periods of time I mean weeks. I like it for a few days. But then I want to shower. I know, it's natural beauty. I love natural beauty, but only for so long and only without bugs. I love adventures, but if outdoor adventures aren't adventurous enough --- count me out. I'll stay inside where there are toilets and 99 percent less mosquitoes.

4) At the airport, I've stopped bothering to put my liquids in a plastic bag. Why? Because I forgot once and they totally didn't say anything. So now, I forgo the little baggie. I take that back, the last time I put my 4 oz bottle of lotion in my bag and they found it. Then, they proceeded to say - next time, put that in a plastic bag. Ok. Will do. Thanks...

5) I may have been a public relations major, but I still am helplessly victimized by mascara ads and any ad for anti-wrinkle cream. I totally fall for them, and not rationally. Each time I see those ads, I understand their promised benefits won't provide. Yet, I am still entranced by the idea that their product could make my lashes look 50 times longer and forever prevent wrinkles. I've adapted a steady pattern when it comes to viewing awesome mascara ads. It goes like this: Become amazed at mascara, go out and buy it, discover it's not any different than the last and experience disappointment. Unless, of course, it's Lancome's Definicils. The best I've discovered so far. No one even paid me to say that.

6) I'm tired at the moment. But don't worry, I have more secrets. I will save them for another perfect spring day like today (which, will be tomorrow, undoubtedly. I love MN weather...).

7) Oh I almost forgot! Secret seven is that I am not really in a relationship despite what facebook says. The end.

Warm Welcome

I would like to thank Minnesota for warmly welcoming me back into its territory. Five hours ago, the climate surrounding me was 75 degrees and sunny. Now, it is -10 degrees, dark and cold. Not to mention I am currently locked out of my house. Lovely. Thanks to my neighbors I am not dead yet. So good to be back...

Gift Bag

Events of the day. I turned in my 27 page paper on a development project for Goma. Unfortunately, it is not very well edited. I didn't have time. I completed it ten minutes after class started, printed it off, and ran to class. Out of breath, I turned it in just as everyone began leaving (class was let out early). Whew. I'm glad that thing is over though. It consumed approximately 48 full hours of the last three days - and like I said, I didn't even get a chance to thoroughly edit it.

It is a winter wonderland out right now. Very pretty. I think God made snow so pretty to get us through the bitter cold. Thanks God. Snow was a great creation, as long as I do not have to drive in it:).

I have nothing else to randomly comment on at the moment. Well, except for I am very confused as to how a Fatman Scoop song got on my iTunes... I guess I will get back to my normal routine of finishing up papers! If anyone ever needs to know how to implement a participatory radio program for women's empowerment in Goma, DRC, let me know. I have 27 pages of great information. Peace out.

Oh - and I titled this post Gift Bag because reading it is like digging into a Gift Bag - full of random surprises. :)

Things I Do Not Understand: A Brief List

Welcome to the first or second version of “Things I Do Not Understand,” a commentary on the mysteries of our world. Like most of my thoughts sans a point, this list was inspired by a really boring class. Let us begin.

Things I Do Not Understand

- Why my predictive text-messaging tool does not like the word “sucks.” Is it censoring my language? Is the word “suck,” or “sucks” offensive to this mechanical being? Every flipping time I try to punch in that word, “pucks,” comes up as default. Dear cell phone, have I ever, in my life, texted the word “pucks?” The answer is no! I have, however, texted the word sucks multiple times! You have stopped bringing up “ankled” instead of “Colleen,” so why insist on “pucks?” And P.S., “sucks” stopped being a swear word in 1950 – long before you were born – so get over it!!!

- Why Minnesota does not medicate itself. Don’t get me wrong; I love Minnesota. It’s pretty much the best state ever - it is one of the most educated states and have one of the highest standards of living in the nation - not to mention we can “drink the tap water and breath the air” (thanks Atmosphere). However, I feel like Minn. could benefit a lot from a few anti-depressants, because it is pretty bi-polar. What else could explain a climate that goes from 75 and sunny on Monday to 35 and snowy on Friday? That is not normal. Out of love, I urge you, Minnesota, to get some help!!!

- Why I had to explain to people, seriously, why Obama is not the antichrist during his campaign. What is our world coming to? I need not say more. (Disclaimer: this is not the fault of those who asked, but rather, those who went around claiming this. To those I say this: Read the Bible, Get a Grip.)

- Arabic. I go to class every day, but I still only know like five words. And don’t even ask me how to put sentences together. I try and it comes out looking like a kindergarten project. I will persevere through.

I can’t think of anything else right now. Apparently everything else in this world makes perfect sense. Sweet!

The Jungle Book First-Grader in Edina

The other week, I acquiesced my younger sister’s request to serve as her substitute as a kids ministry leader at church. Along with another guy, she leads a small group of first grade boys every week. Now, working with kids isn’t exactly a “gift” of mine. Although, I am pretty talented at babysitting children while they are asleep. It’s a tough job, but I have that one down. Regardless, I took on this group of boys for the night.

The curriculum that night was about fear, and how to trust in God to overcome our fears or something along those lines. So after viewing a lively competition of “Leader Fear Factor,” which consisted of frightening competitions such as “who can drink a McDonald’s Happy Meal the quickest,” we sat the boys down for discussion time. The other leader asked the kids to tell us one thing they are afraid of. Their responses were fairly typical.

“I’m afraid of sitting on Ben’s head (or something),” said one boy (editor’s note, his friend’s name was Ben). Another boy quipped, “I’m afraid of the dark,” and yet another was afraid of “gross stuff.” Then it was Ben’s turn. My co-leader turned to Ben, “Ben, what are you afraid of?"

Ben: “Um, one time, during the dry season, in Africa, I was walking over the bridge of Victoria Falls, and I looked down and it was high and I almost fell off. Well I really didn’t almost fall off but kind of. And then also, I’m afraid of having a hippo charge after me, because hippos are big. One time, in Africa a hippo almost ran towards us.”

My co-leader looks at me with a sort of, perplexed awe. “Okay, well yeah, those things are scary, (pause) during the dry season.”

Man, this kid has more experience than me, and he’s only six. He's like, the kid from the Jungle Book (editor's note: yes, I realize that didn't take place in Africa. You get the point.).

Apparently, to experience real adventure, I need to spend more time in Africa; during the dry season of course. I just did not expect to learn this from a first grader in Edina. Yet another lesson in not judging a book by it's cover.

A Note to My Hair

Dear Hair -

Get a grip.

You really need to have more emotional control. Going crazy with just a hint of sucky weather is a sign of weakness. Shape up, or I will burn you more often with a 450 degree curling iron.

Love,

Me


P.S. I'm going to see Michelle Obama speak this afternoon. Score!

FINANCIAL THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

Stolen from Molly, good stuff:

If you had purchased $1,000.00 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago you would have $49.00 left. With Enron, you would have had $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00. With WorldCom, you would have had less than $5.00 left.

But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank all of the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have $214.00 cash. Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle. - It's called the 401-Keg.
A recent study found the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found Americans drink, on the average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon. Makes You Proud To Be An American!